The Struggle is in Your Head


As merely humans, we tend make mountains out of molehills – literally. So it’s no wonder during your walk as a single Christian, it seems that there is a gigantic magnifying glass on you. Thoughts run around in your head, “Everyone is waiting for me to get hitched,” or even “Everyone is looking at me wondering what’s wrong with me.” I get it.  It’s not fun to feel like the single “black sheep” while everyone else is running around in relationships or marriage in their happily ever after while you are left to pity yourself.

There’s a slight misconception about marriage and being finally “connected” to someone. Although lovely at it’s best, marriage doesn’t define any person. You have not “arrived” once you get married. You haven’t even begun when you get married. So singles, especially Christian singles, rushing into relationships and marriages hoping to maybe fall in the club of “wanted” – is a very dangerous route.

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I want to pin point a simple fact: the struggle you feel as a single is all in your head – it’s the enemy’s plan to get you off course with discouragement. So when you feel the struggle is real, remember these important facts:

WHO IS YOUR FRIEND

We know that God doesn’t send feelings of loneliness, discontentment, anger, frustration, comparison, incompleteness – so right off the bat Christian singles should  notice that these emotions come from the enemy. And since we know the enemy is definitely not our friend, we should not give into those feelings when they come. Recognize what God sends which is patience, contentment and joy.

YOU WERE CALLED OUT

Because you have given your life to Christ, and are a born again believer – God has called you out. You wonder why your counterparts have it easy when getting a man / woman but you have difficulty keeping one? It’s because God has too much invested in you to have it poisoned by someone who is not fit to be  in your life, especially romantically. So He removes those you attached to yourself for His use. God has set you aside for this reason. Remember, the person God has for you has to agree with and help you in your now and in your destiny later.

SINGLENESS IS A SEASON

You might say well it’s been a long season… like years – but it’s just for a season you will be single. The season may be months, or years, but there is something that God is calling your attention to in the meantime. He may be building your character. He may be giving you time to work on your ministry. He may be telling you to heal from your past. Don’t let your impatience ruin what God is trying to work in you during this season.

Don’t make your singleness a “struggle”. I know you hear embrace your singleness, but it is so much truth and wisdom in that – beyond what you currently see. Trust God.

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